Ohio legislators don’t know what they’re talking about. Cleveland Browns and Cincinnati Bengals fans should be allowed to get high. They’ve endured enough.
There are plenty of reasons a person should be allowed to purchase medical marijuana.
From glaucoma to cancer to anxiety, as long as the doctor thinks cannabis can help you out, you’ve got a pretty good reason to get a prescription for it. Well, that all depends on what state you live in because in Ohio, you can’t cheer on a rancid NFL franchise, suffer from it and be allowed to burn.
According to the Cincinnati Inquirer, three new conditions that marijuana can be used medically are up for consideration: Anxiety, autism spectrum disorder and cachexia. Of the conditions rejected by the state of Ohio include being a fan of the Cleveland Browns or Cincinnati Bengals.
While those first three conditions are obviously much more serious, can’t these poor fans catch a break? Haven’t Browns and Bengals fans suffered enough?
The Browns were once a proud franchise in the 1950s. They won three championships under the guidance of the legendary Paul Brown. But since the dawn of the Super Bowl era, Cleveland is one of four franchises to never play for the Lombardi Trophy. Cleveland also lost its team in 1996, only to get back an expansion team in 1999. The Browns last made the playoffs in 2002. It’s bad.
The Bengals were born from Browns owner Art Modell and Brown hating each other. Brown opted to found his own AFL franchise. Despite being home of two major offensive innovations (West Coast, Hurry-Up), the Bengals lost their two Super Bowls to the San Francisco 49ers in the 1980s. They haven’t won a playoff game since 1990. Cincinnati has the No. 1 pick in the upcoming draft.
Ohio is where American football was born. Fans of these poor AFC North franchises should be allowed to cope with their horrible life decision to support these teams by any reasonable means. This is the closest thing they’ll taste to Super Bowl Sunday.
C’mon now, we’re not talking about any hard drugs, of course. We’re talking about smoking a little weed to help deal with another careless Baker Mayfield interception or another instance where Mike Brown is the cheapest man on Earth.
Ohioans should be able to enjoy their fall Sundays like the rest of us. Saturday might be their day in the sun with the Ohio State Buckeyes, but let’s heal their broken souls one bowl at a time. Get a little high to get ready for another high draft pick. This aggression will not stand, man.