These Andy Reid Easter Eggs are pure nightmare fuel

A Kansas City Chiefs player drew Andy Reid’s face on some Easter Eggs and they are guaranteed to make children cry.

Kansas City Chiefs head coach Andy Reid finally won his first Super Bowl this season and if that wasn’t a big enough accomplishment for one year, Reid can now add “having his face on an Easter egg” to his resume.

Chiefs defensive end Tanoh Kpassagnon decided to honor his head coach this Easter by drawing Reid’s face on some of his Easter eggs. The resemblance is uncanny, with loving attention to detail. Reid’s grandfatherly spectacles? Check. His signature walrus-like mustache? Check.

The only difference between these eggs and the real Andy Reid is that while the real Chiefs coach has a warm and pleasant disposition, these eggs are downright terrifying.

Look at these things.

Look, I am not trying to be unkind here. I can’t draw a straight line with a ruler, let alone Andy Reid’s likeness on an egg using a pencil. Kpassagnon is clearly talented. But when I was scrolling through Twitter and I saw the post from the Chiefs’ official account sharing the egg images, I was expecting something totally different.

I figured the eggs would be painted red and would represent Reid’s entire body. I envisioned a small, cartoonish face up near the top of the egg. I pictured something children in Kansas City would be delighted to find in their Easter baskets.

Instead, what I got was something straight out of a Saw movie. You see, there is more going on here than meets the eye. What seems like a little harmless Easter fun on the surface may very well be more suited for Halloween.

Now as I said, my initial reaction to these eggs was that they were creepy looking. Then I noticed one of the eggs was smiling so I took a closer look. Kind of cute, I guess. The gumdrops scattered around are a little weird but I suppose…wait a minute…what the…holy crap look again.

The egg to the left of the smiling Andy Reid has a GD HOLE in its head!


No doubt the smiling Andy Reid sucked the brains out. We have an egg murder here. And look at the other Andy Reid egg in the background. His face is pure horror and shock.

Let’s look in on the face of the Andy Reid egg that had its brains sucked out by vampire Andy. Yep. Look at the vacant stare. The sideways gaze. It makes my blood run cold.

Finally, Kpassagnon posted a photo of himself with all three eggs. Admiring his handiwork no doubt. I’m half-serious when I say Kpassagnon might be an artistic genius. Think about it. Look at all three of those eggs. It all adds up. The looks on their faces, the strategically placed hole in the one photo.

And this last one, look closely at Kpassagnon right hand. What is that on his fingernail?

Blood. Obviously.

Happy Easter.

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