Baltimore Ravens, Tampa Bay Buccaneers

The secret to Tom Brady’s success is still having an iPhone 6 Plus

Tom Brady’s iPhone is old enough to start learning how to read books.

Tom Brady gives off some massive Big Dad Energy when it comes to using his out-of-date iPhone.

Since destroying his previous cellular device in the wake of DeflateGate, Brady has had the same Apple cellphone model since early 2015. How can we even confirm this? By looking at four consecutive quote tweets from verified accounts on Twitter. Brady may be turning 43 years old today, but his iPhone 6 Plus is old enough to start kindergarten. We all miss nap time or what?

So let’s unwrap the greatest present we’ll uncover on Monday, Aug. 3, shall we? The NFL tweeted out a picture of Brady in a Tampa Bay Buccaneers jersey, celebrating his 21st year in the league and his 43rd on planet earth. Again, it’s totally harmless, but the quote tweet from Brady tells us everything. “Thank you for the bday wishes!! Might treat myself to a new iPhone this year…”

And because The Action Network’s Darren Rovell is Darren Rovell, he informed the Twitterverse of how old Brady’s trusty iPhone is. “Brady currently uses an iPhone 6 Plus, which came out in Sept. 2014.” Tracking the age of phones isn’t exactly cool, but it sure as hell is useful in this exercise, ain’t it?

And if we need anymore proof that you can be supremely excellent at your job, the forever Mayor of Sacksonville in Baltimore Ravens defensive end Calais Campbell chimed in by quote tweeting Rovell with, “Ayy me and Brady got something in common! Maybe after this season we will have something else in common too?” Clearly, having an old ass phone turns star players into legends.

iPhone 6 Pluses are why Tom Brady and Calais Campbell are NFL superstars.

Fact: Not all heroes wear capes. However, even you can go purchase an iPhone, take care of it and it will take care of you from one Olympiad to another. As a person who has had the same iPhone model since June 2015, I can say the power of the iPhone 6 Plus makes you feel like a champion every time you look at it. Though it struggles to hold a charge, it has made me great at what I do.

I will never win a Super Bowl, nor will I be the Walter Payton Man of the Year. I will never be considered a GOAT, nor will I ever be the Mayor of Sacksonville. However, I can save money on my quest to greatness like my heroes Brady, Campbell and whoever invented the iPhone 6 Plus. When our sacred phone model dies, a part of us dies along with it. I’m here for you, Tom and Calais.

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So while Brady was telling us to not eat nightshades, wear kale pajamas to bed and not drink any adult beverages during football season, he knew deep down his trusty iPhone was the secret to his success. What’s on that phone besides Gisele Bündchen’s phone number? There’s also a great chance it has the address of one Byron Leftwich stored in it somewhere because, “Hey, neighbor!”

Brady and Campbell’s collective Big Dad Energy are why they’ll be Canton brothers for life in a bit.

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